It’s safe to say that I have mommy issues. After many years and lots of therapy, I’m very aware and honest about it. My mother is unique, loving, strong, wise, passionate, creative, daring, funny, emotional, fearful, and very anxious. As her daughter, I’ve inherited a lot of her qualities. So when it comes to managing and relieving anxiety, yoga is my other mother and has assisted me in healing my mommy issues.
I always wanted some things my mother couldn’t consistently give me. I imagine these are things she wanted, too. If she would’ve found yoga as a young mom like I did, things might’ve been different for her and for me. But she gave me a lot of great advice that I now see is very yogic.
YOGIC ADVICE = MOTHER’S LOVE
As a child, when I felt bad about something she would chant her mantra: “Think happy thoughts!” She never encouraged me to compete with others for what they had but reminded me of all of my gifts. She laughed at herself, was open about her story, and was all about gratitude. She was the definition of a non-hoarder and I learned the art of letting go from her. Anytime we wanted something new she’d say “What are you going to get rid of?”
Most of us with anxiety have stories about our families. I believe in collecting and connecting our dots. Knowing ourselves and where we come from is a strong human desire. Acceptance and gratitude are powerful tools to meet our stories with love and peace. Yoga is all about caring for ourselves and accepting who we are as if receiving a mother’s love.
When I freak out and feel at the bottom of a well of anxiety, I get a feeling I describe as “needing my mom”. There’s this need for comfort and soothing that all babies and children innately crave. The need for the feelings a mother would or should bring doesn’t go away in adulthood. But as adults it becomes up to us to take care of ourselves. If you are open to it, yoga can definitely help with mommy issues. Without question, practicing yoga has changed my life. It has provided a space for me to comfort and regulate myself, just like a loving mother would.
HOW YOGA IS A MOTHER
I’ve had some amazing mother figures, yoga teachers and mentors. I hear their voices every time I practice or teach.
These are ways yoga can help with mommy issues:
- Calms me down and lets me feel gentle, like everything is going to be okay.
- Shows me limits and lets me play up to my edges.
- Invites me to slow down and breathe.
- Reminds me to get up and move and to lie down and rest.
- Encourages me to take chances, to show up, and that it’s okay to fail and not be perfect.
- Gives me guidance and structure.
- Tells me that I can change my thoughts.
- Gives me freedom and encouragement to make my own choices.
- Helps me feel safe and supported.
- Helps me love myself.
- Says that I’m perfect just the way I am.
- Shows me that I don’t have to be or look like anyone else and it’s nice to look around and see the amazing stuff that others can do.
- Helps me see my strengths and my weaknesses so I can shine and grow.
- Inspires me to feel my feelings without pushing them back down.
- Lets me cry.
- Tells me not to feel shame when I fall.
As a yoga teacher, I pull out my motherly instincts. Here’s a class called Give Yourself a Break if you’d like a little mothering comfort today.